Saturday, March 3, 2018

This is what I wrote about on a flight to Ecuador: Things that Don't Make Sense

I’m firmly convinced that those air hand-dryers in restrooms are a scam. There are several varieties of them—there’s the classic “Press Button, Receive Bacon” one, there’s the Dyson Airblade, there’s the one where you slowly pull your hands out, and the list goes on. Here are my grievances against them.

First of all, they’re pretty ineffective. Many of them automatically shut off after a specified length of time, and I’m all like, “Excuse me, my hands aren’t dry yet,” and then I begin another cycle. As a related sub-grievance, they take at least three times as long as using paper towels. Second, they’re really loud. When was the last time paper towels sounded like a leaf-blower in an enclosed space? Third, I think part of the marketed appeal of them to consumers is in their “more sanitary” nature over paper towels. I fail to see how a machine that blows water droplets from someone’s hand into the air is more sanitary than paper towels. Some of these machines—like the ones where you slowly pull your hands out—collect water at the bottom. That seems far more unsanitary to me: a pool of stagnant water congealing where you put your just-washed hands. (Also, why do people assert that paper towels are unsanitary? Paper towels come pre-packaged, so they’re sterile. In addition, you use them after you’ve washed your hands, so presumably, used paper towels might be some of the most sanitary things out there.) Fourth, I think another part of the marketed appeal is the claimed waste reduction—saving trees and whatever. Ok, sure, but each use of an electric hand dryer comes at the cost of burning coal to generate the electricity. Maybe the relative emissions from one use is less than the net negative effect of using three paper towels, but I somehow doubt that Dyson and other air-dryer manufacturers have actually studied and measured this. Once this is demonstrably shown, I’ll buy into the air hand-dryer craze. Until then, just compost your paper towels.

Of course, the probable reason these devices have become so popular is that you install them once and only need to pay attention to them when they break. With paper towel dispensers, you need to repeatedly monitor and replenish the supply. That’s labor, which is a cost. I doubt that many of the owners of these devices care at all about the four points listed above and instead care purely about cost.

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Growing up, my parents made us wash dishes in a way which I found puzzling even as a child. In an effort to save water, we only used the dishwasher’s “light wash” setting. Since that setting wasn’t very thorough, we had to rinse and lightly scrub everything before it went in the dishwasher to ensure that no residual food would remain after the cycle. This also meant that putting pots and pans in the dishwasher was out of the question. Such items required enough scrubbing to get the residual food off that it was basically already done. Also, they do occupy rack space pretty inefficiently.

This was silly. I’m pretty sure dishwashers were invented in the first place to make the process of washing dishes more efficient. Perhaps historically they used more water than handwashing did, and their appeal was merely the convenience factor (I’m looking at you, 1950’s); but given how market economies work, more efficient dishwashers would ultimately have had a competitive advantage over less efficient ones. And the fact that water-stricken states such as California don’t have strict dishwasher selection laws for building permitting leads me to believe that dishwashers don’t use more water than hand washing.

So the point of this vignette is that my parents were wrong, and dishwashers should be fully embraced and used to the fullest of their abilities. I will say, though, it is quite difficult unlearning all those years of “rinse then put in the dishwasher, but no pots and pans!” I almost always rinse my plates before putting them in; and I find myself leaving pots and pans in the sink to wash by hand later.

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